Sunday, January 15, 2012

If you do...

The last couple of weeks has really been an eye opener for me. I am learning so much about my life that I think I already knew but maybe had forgotten or even denied for a long time. But when you unclutter your mind and turn your focus to what's important, your eyes are open to some things! If you are willing God will show you some things to help your life.

A couple of those things are: 1. Although I know that self-control is a fruit of the spirit, it is not one that is ripe in me yet. 2. I am not convince that God has forgiven me for ALL my sins. Especially those great big ones that I committed...they are still lingering!

So this self-control thing, it hinders every part of a person's life. Finances, health, relationships, jobs...I can't believe it. If you don't have self-control then you will overspend, over eat and just suck the life out of people with your emotional roller coaster. I have found though that lack of self-control just stems from fear and untrust. If you overspend for example, its because you want stuff that you don't have and are willing to sacrifice your bill money to get it because you fear that you can't ever afford it or you are not trusting God to get it to you. Same goes for over are just trying to fill a hole that only God can fill. I don't even want to get into relationships. So, how do you trust God in these areas so you can let go and have some self-control?? Get in the word. Learn the principles. We know the promises of God. We know God promises us prosperity and we pray for that. We are promised health and healing but we cannot expect the promises but not practice the principles. Seek ye first the kingdom of God...Are you shopping with your tithe money? How do we learn the principles? We will never learn the principles without reading the word and learning on our own. Learn by revelation knowledge through the holy spirit.

Now, knowing I am forgiven is something that God and I have been working on. Some days I know it but then I am reminded by something or someone how HORRIBLE the sin is in the worlds eye and I have to go back and beg at God's feet again. That is NOT a requirement of God. That is an insecurity of my own. I find myself asking God if he REALLY forgives me for (fill in sin here). His answer is always yes but a couple of nights ago he not only said YES he also said "And now its time for you to forgive YOURSELF"...WOW, YES!!! I understand that forgiveness comes with time. I know that it takes some time to find that forgiveness within myself. I also know that when you truly forgive others you can look at them and not feel that anger/upset in your spirit. I am not there with myself but I am on the road to wishing myself well :)

Ephesians 1:11-14 says It's in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone. 13 -14It's in Christ that you, once you heard the truth and believed it this Message of your salvation), found yourselves home free—signed, sealed, and delivered by the Holy Spirit. This signet from God is the first installment on what's coming, a reminder that we'll get everything God has planned for us, a praising and glorious life.

REALLY? Here I sit, missing on all that God offers me because I can't let go of something in my past? Isn't that the silliest thing ever? Something that he doesn't even remember. As far as the East is from the West, that's how far he has removed our transgressions from us!! Do you know that it is impossible to measure the distance between the east and west?? You can't do it. I started typing this in sort of a blah state but I have typed myself happy LOL. Forgiving myself has moved to the top of my list.

I heard someone say "If you do what I do, you will have what I have" if any of you have struggled with forgiving yourself and conquered it I would love to chat about it. There has to be some practical things to do along side the spiritual so I am all ears!!

Oh yea, I wrote my first tithe check today since my heart completely change about it and felt absolute FREEDOM! I have written my budget! I have a picture of my new car where I can look at it, imagine myself driving it and see myself signing those papers!

So far, 2012 is super!!

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